Why Yoga?

What does yoga mean to me?

I wanted to be a yoga instructor for years. Every so often, the urge would wash over me and I would delve into program research, thinking of all the things I could do, only to have my self-doubt declare that I could never spend that kind of money on a “hobby.” Nevertheless, the inkling kept coming back to me, always stronger than the time before. I never could put my finger on what made it so appealing, until I attended a yoga retreat at Stonehouse Farm in July of 2016. I went without knowing anybody, without knowing what to expect. The energy that met me was overwhelming in the most positive way imaginable. Being surrounded by like-minded people, feeling the energy flowing from body to body, and being unencumbered by the “real world” were the perfect storm. I knew that this community was something that I needed to involve myself in more deeply. Around the fire on the first night, one of the instructors posed the question:

“What character do you play in your life, and how are they different from who you are?”

The question struck me in a place that I didn’t know existed, deep down within me where I’d been repressing all kinds of emotions. This stranger that I had just met had articulated the exact sentiments that I had been unable to articulate for much too long. I decided then that I would stop ignoring these recurring urges to take the leap, and I registered myself in teacher training within 20 minutes of returning home.

Yoga was the first exercise I found that made my joints feel better rather than worse. It made an overweight, self-conscious high schooler feel capable and strong. It’s what has grounded me throughout the years, helping me to feel both victorious and humble; sometimes at once. Yoga pushes me to my fullest potential. It allows me to see the rewards of goal-setting. It has helped me learn to trust my body; to listen to my body over my ego. It has taught me to let go of the perception of how things are supposed to be in order to find the truth in what things are. It has taught me to love my body for what it can do, not how much it weighs. Yoga is there to appreciate the moment, as well as when you just want the moment to pass. It can take you to the edge when you want to enjoy the view, and take you away from it when you find yourself too close. Yoga is self-expression to the fullest degree. Yoga is self-love in a way that cannot be replicated.